What We Tell Ourselves


sad girlPeople’s behaviors are largely related to conditioning from their past. We often cope with internal struggles through learned behaviors with food, alcohol, tobacco and other substances that are destructive when we overindulge.

When I speak with patients in my practice and inquire about how those habits arose, many are learned from an early age (especially habits regarding food). The subconscious mind, or that part that “holds” our beliefs of the world and ourselves, interacts with the external world by way of our actions. Sigmund Freud compared the conscious mind (the one that interacts with the world) to the tip of an iceberg. The thoughts and beliefs that drive our actions are never seen by an outside observer.

We don’t realize the power of our words and what we tell ourselves. Our thoughts illustrate our beliefs, and come out in the words we tell ourselves. We tell ourselves “I can’t do this” or “I will never lose weight.” These thoughts and beliefs keep us in a place of stability and comfort, despite being unhappy at the place we’re in.

I discovered a technique called “Be Set Free Fast,” developed by psychologist Larry Nims, Ph.D You can do the technique on your own or seek a therapist trained in leading you through it.

birdAnother technique is called Emotional Freedom Technique, or The Tapping Solution. EFT involves gently tapping certain points on the body when you’re anxious or stressed. The points, called meridians in acupuncture, facilitate healing. The stress response is mediated through the amygdala in the brain and this process calms it.

These techniques give you tools to tell ourselves a different story than the one we have been using.

What do you say to yourself that keeps you trapped in your old story?

What techniques have you found to rewrite the story?


4 thoughts on “What We Tell Ourselves

  1. I have a friend who is a hypnotherapist and as she did her training, she shared a lot of what she learned about our beliefs and how our conscious/subconscious mind works. It’s amazing what stories we tell ourselves which aren’t exactly true when we delve into them with the help of someone who has been trained in how the mind/body connection works. I have not experienced EFT, but I have experienced EMT (eye movement therapy) which I thought too simplistic but found that oftentimes the simple readjustment is what is needed.


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